I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
