Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
This baby is an asshole
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
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