god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
