I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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