Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I just want nice things and good sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Randomize