I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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