I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
