we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize