is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.