Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
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