Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize