He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
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