Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize