I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
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You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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