We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
