ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize