you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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