not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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