I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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