why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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