Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I just forgot I was standing up.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
