Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
