is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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