All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Randomize
