Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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