Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Randomize
