I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Come share oat with me in your robe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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