Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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