? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Welp...herpes.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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