Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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