I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
