All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
