thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize