I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize