uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize
