He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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