We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
