You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
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On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
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I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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