She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
You've changed since you got that strap on
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
