I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
