They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize