I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
false alarm. still invincible.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize
