So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize