This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
