Welp...herpes.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
