I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I cut my penus on the lid.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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