Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
