you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
