There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Drunk is a universal language darling
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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