lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize